In Remembrance of The Holocaust

Today we had an assembly with a holocaust survivor at our school. At first I was like " This is sooooo cool! I get to here about it and miss math! OMG!" Completely ecstatic until it entered my brain what the holocaust was. Now being me, and having hundreds maybe thousands (idk I dont count) of people around me crying and feeling terrible for this person was not a good place to be. I walked into the MU and was like Crap why couldnt I have called in sick?!

I was sitting next to my friend telling her about it(she already knows)(and only 2 people know so far k) and she said," Ok Im ready, bring on the tears!" I'm glad I had somebody like that. But it turns out, I couldnt feel nothing, nada. Well from the people around me. I felt everything from the speaker. I think her name was Ms. Sessler. Yah thats it. Either that or everybody around me felt no remorse or sadness for her and her sister. Which would be truly sad.

The speaker turned out to be not to emotional, which was strange. It was her thoughts that were more disturbing. I could pick up everything. Every word that came out of her mouth described picture in her head. It was more like a movie I was seeing. Every smell, taste, wimper of hunger came rushing to my brain. But it didnt matter unless she made me feel sad. I could she everything she saw, I even picked up on her sister a little from her point of view. But the only thing I couldnt grasp was color. All I saw were light browns, dirty whites, and greys. All meshing and swirling into one another. Hard to tell apart each color. It was either emotions effecting it or I've been watching to many black and white movies like Schindler's List. The only time I almost balled with tears was when she talked about her and her sister being 2 of the 32 women saved from that camp. It was when she had to leave behind her mom.

The rest of the time she was pretty stable. She had a mix of being happy from being a survivor, and thinking of the hurtful flashbacks. At the end I looked around and most were in tears, some just with there heads down our looking mournful. But not I. The sad thought was I was happy and looked like an idiot. But of course the speaker was happy after telling of her liberation.

The saddest part for me though was that when she told of how the german soldier whipped her back and I tried to be sad. Like I really tried, because I hated the state of having mixed feelings, but not even one tear would come to my eye. Not one.

DC baby

My class is headed out for spring break tonight at 2:00 in the morning to DC, New York and Virginia. I'm all packed up and ready to go. Then my mom puts a watch around my wrist and I get the slightest shock of revenge. For putting me in chain links. Its like a spirit possessed me but not for to long before I got really mad. I still feel like I'm linked up though in chains or in a tracker. Weird right?

Today was a good day until I got to drama. Its always drama haha. It was a little cold today but not bad enough that i was shivering. So when I got to drama and we were writing in these journals, I felt like needles were stabbing me and jabbing into me everywhere. I couldn't see them but it sure felt like it. Then a wash of coldness ran through the room. Like I was sensing a spirit there but usually only animals can notice it. I was shivering and shaking the whole period trying to make it subtle but failing in attempt. There were three ways I could have been affected.

1. Somebody was feeling really really really depressed.

2.A spirit was in the room trying to hurt me.

or 3. A person was killing themselves or being killed.

I have to say I think it was number 2 cuz I didnt find anybody sad. There wasn't anybody getting killed that I know of. It could have been a really strong bond from far away but I doubt it. And I asked the people around me if they were cold. They were definitely not cold.

Let me tell ya, I was so happy when I got out of that room because everybody was talking about torture and killing, which made me almost cry on top of the pain. It was about the worst moment of my life....yet nobody really noticed.

Blah Blah Blah

Things are well you know. More psychic stuff. Today I was thinking about the GreenMission to Antartica because I had read about it in this book. I come home I'm on Facebook taking some stupid quiz and it says what would you most like to do to help the earth, one of the answers was the GreenMission to Antartica.

Later I'm talking to my mom about stuff that happened when we were at the park shooting this movie. It was about these ten year olds fighting over a little girl and I was the co-director/acting coach. Anyway while I'm telling my mother she says were you guys filming A Walk To Remember? And when I came home I was looking at a guys profile on this site and one of his fav. movies was a walk to remember. Most of you wouldn't think this would be in thepsychic category but it is. I will be posting random pictures because I think they are funny. :)

Tired, Bored, and Tired

Math ugh as always. My mother cant get it through her thick skull whats wrong with me!

Moving on... fatigued from the play. I can't get over how tired I am. Its been going on for a week now. Wed. I felt my knees were going to buckle after running the mile, then I had to go to volleyball practice. They seemed fine until I started having muscle spasms this morning in Core. It was so bad I had to ask my friend get up and pass papers for me. I was completely glued to my seat. So over all......bad week.

Ever feel like your high off of love. Well after breaking up with Taylor it made me feel I definitely didn't want to have a boyfriend till I got older, but then there is this feeling you need more. Need to get back into the grove. Like it wasn't good enough. It's also a little annoying he starts hugging and tickling and chasing one of his ex-girlfriends, who happens to be one of my very good friends. Yah I here what your saying. Stupid, move on, lifes complicated, yata yata. I really am not that jealous believe it or not. I'm completely over it, but its still you know, a hit below the belt.

I'm trying to change myself, for my friends. Lately things are oober weird with my psychic stuff. Of course like I said before math tutoring was not great, then on the way home, I sware I saw a flash of a rainbow, like right before my eyes. But it was gone in an instant. Weirdest of all through wooden closed fences. Completely closed no gaps. I could see right through them, and when I asked my siblings they said they couldnt see windows or a house at all through the fence. Hope its not a hallucination after all my fatigue.

The picture up there^^^^^ resembles me. To tired to care so you look like an idiot.

WALL!

Lately I think my luck has turned around. I mean I have been having the worst month ever, from bad test grades to well a lot of stuff you could imagine. But today things got better. We have a rotating schedule and first period was english, we did nothing the whole period! Then came math that wasn't to swell but like I've said before math isn't the best class for me. Then off to science where we had to pick colors out of a hat to see which team we would be on for jeapordy. Right before I took a color out, I focused and I just blurted out blue. Well I think you can guess what color it was. And as it turns out we won and got some extra credit for our next test. I had the dumbest people on my team, yet we won. My group was jumping up and down going bonkers.

After that I went to P.E. where I just played volleyball all period, nothing terrible. Then came spanish....the worst boring period ever! Yet today it went by really fast which made me hella thankful. You have no idea hoow much that class tortures your brain.

I was loopy on happiness the WHOLE day because well you know, the psychic emotion stuff. Not one sad thing came into sight, until drama of course. Thats like the best period of the day. FOR EVERYONe. well not today. This one guy I sat next to was a little mopey, but it really rubbed off on me. If you have the same emotion psychic problems I do then hears how to solve em. I saw this white line developing linking between our heads. For most people if you dont see it then just imagine. Then you see a pair of scissors snipping the line and watch as the remains fall to the ground, do they cant effect you any more. Also you can just imagine the white string falling down.

Weeeeeeelllll that didn't work at first so I was still pretty mopey. Then while I was talking to a girl behind me I was like "WALL!" and I put up this imaginary wall separating me from the mopey guy. I was completely serious until I figured out it actually worked and the people around me were laughing so of course I started laughing, and it became all hunkey dorey from that point on.

Last word of advice, everybody is psychic. wether they are just a little bit like predicting a color to predicting when the phone will ring, everybody has a touch of that in them. You just have to find help to guide it to grow. From that point on its all in your hands.

Advanced Math Class

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo math tutor was ok. He's not terrible but not amazing either. I don't know... I couldn't pick up any vibe from him really. He just seemed like a complete math geek and all he did was tutoring. Get this! He has every single test from like every school in the area and he books his whole week and weekend just for tutoring. Haahaha. Anyway FYI online PSI or ESP tests are complete BULL. Well there bull for my psychic abilities. There all the same, so go ahead and try em but I dont recommend it.

I think I told my mom a million times I'm psychic but she doesn't believe me. I think if I say it one more time she will hospitalize me. I tell her all the time I can't be in advanced math because of my abilities but all she does is push, push, push. It's kinda hard with numbers and shadows distracting ya in class. The numbers usually only tend to pop up in math I've noticed. Lately I've been noticing more shadows in class. They hold onto me and like I don't know if you will understand, but they give off this sad depressing energy. I'm also a psychic who gets attached to other peoples emotions. It's all very confusing.

Math Tutoring and Greek Mythology

Today my mom told me she signed me up for math tutoring with some random guy, and she doesn't even know about the F I got on my last quiz. Well any way I've been totally into greek mythology lately ever since my grandma got me a book all about it. I was reading about the God Hermes and how he always had this sign Caduceus. Which is loaded up above. Or below. I'm still getting used to this haha. But once I read about it I went to Walgreens and saw it before the pharmacy, then it keeps turning up everywhere. Thats what I mean when I see labels or pictures then they start appearing everywhere. It's the sign for medical stuff.

Overview of last couple weeks

Its March 20th 9:06 pm in California. Well if you couldn't tell by the blog name, i'm a psychic and no I'm not crazy. This is all real, all true. So here it goes.

I broke up with my boyfriend Taylor on our one month anniversary, told my Aunt Jackie I was a psychic, but the good part is she believes me and wants to hold a seance!, the play Thursday night (Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, Im Veruca Salt) went swimmingly, the play Friday night sucked because our stagecraft crew messed up and flung purple paint in my eye which made us delay intermission and made me cry like a wuss. I dont like looking like a wuss FYI. My eye still burns from the paint, Taylor showed up to both nights of the play and the after party, I got an F on my math quiz, there are rats in my pantry (All the food! God dammit stupid rats!), my mother ran into Taylor's mom at Costco and when she got home told me she found out about us after I was crying from our breakup then gave me the birds and bees talk, my psychic visions are going wack which I have no control of, and I'm so sick of the worst month ever I'm ready to just.....stop caring.